A while back, I decided to try something with my writing. Often, or rather all the time, within the writing I’m working on I add parentheses when there’s a thought that I want to keep. These will contain bits that I may want to change, a plot addition or change, or just relevant info that I don’t want to forget. That’s been my thing for ages. When there is no more red font, I know the writing is ready for a review.

What I added was that I write my emotions and/or a positive personal note. When going through depression, it’s so hard to hear anything positive within our minds. The internal voices can be so loud and incredibly toxic. So, I write a genuine positive moment or thought that is about me or about how I felt in that moment.

This week, I came across one of these moments. I hadn’t forgotten that I do these things, but I’d forgotten this particular note. It’s something that surprised me in a pleasant way, which is why I thought I would share with you.

The piece:
“Now I’m actually glad he’s done with me because you and him are not meeting.” (want to adjust to D believing that it’s over b/w P and him. P may think so too….until he gets the envelope, which has him sending Rhea back to D’s side only to find that he’s not there. Damn, I’m good!)
“I assume you mean your hottie now.”

I think we can all guess that I’m pleased with the thought and with myself. Seeing that note made me smile and gave me a laugh. A gentle reminder not to take things too seriously, to definitely have fun, and that it’s good to give yourself a pep-talk every now and then.

If you’re struggling with toxic internal dialogue, may I suggest doing something like this for yourself? In some way, remember the positive moments that you have. They can be fleeting, so give them a voice to be heard again.

I’ll keep working on the above. It’s a passion project between life, work, education, and personal growth. It’ll take some time, but I hope that I won’t give up on myself. And I hope that you won’t give up on you. When you feel that you are, come by and spend some time here. I’m working on a fun project that I’m hoping we can share together once a week. Something light yet honest. More on that to come.

I could have a finished piece to show you, but on the vein of work in progress, I thought this piece might be more fitting. I am in love with seeing how things evolve. I love the marriage of sketch meets finished. I may finish this piece yet, but I may keep it as it because I love what this piece says to me. But what are your thoughts?

Selina