A friend and I connected with a long video chat this weekend. Though we talked about so much in those hours, the one topic highlighted the brightest was our talk about anxiety and panic attacks. We both suffer with these, and we’ve both sought medical professional’s help. I’m not on anything specifically for this, but the use of one medication comes with this lovely side benefit of helping with anxiety. Combined with meditation and art therapy, I am coming out ahead stronger.

It was as we were discussing panic attacks that I realized one of the triggers for my anxiety is simply being asked “what’s wrong?”. My brain transforms this simple question into an attack I can launch onto myself. What is wrong with me? Why can’t I control this? Why does it exist when I have nothing to be anxious about?

Damaging questions that I, for some reason, hadn’t considered as damaging. So, then I ask, why can’t we change the dialogue to, “how can I help?”

While in my realization, my friend softly questioned, “if we don’t let people know that we need help, how will they know how to help?”. She’s annoyingly insightful and intelligent. (I’m grinning).

It is true though. What’s wrong, is a common or standard question to ask. No one has done wrong in asking it. I’ve asked it so many times myself. Perhaps, what I need to start asking is how can I help. When I change my narrative, I influence my brain into not hearing “what is wrong (with me)” but rather “I care about you. How can I help?”. It may be the start to figuring out how I let others know I need help (without feeling like a burden).

Thank you Reen, for loving me enough to influence my thoughts!

Selina

This image is a part of my art therapy. Working towards a goal of publishing my work and showcasing my art is a worthwhile one. But it’s also about working on myself, and art is teaching me so much about me that is worthwhile.